My journey to discovering my neurodivergency, specifically ADHD, started with the diagnosis of my two children. One diagnosed combined type, the other diagnosed inattentive type (formerly known as ADD, a term no longer used as a diagnosis), I researched everywhere I could for any information on how I could be a better, more educated and supportive parent to them. How I could help them be the best thems they could be, and have the easiest time dealing with this new explanation put in front of them? As my research went on, a lot of the information I found seemed to be very applicable to me, as well as them. Could I have ADHD? In helping them along their path, my path started. As I added adult ADHD to my research, I realized very quickly that my knowledge of ADHD was very limited, especially when it came to how ADHD presents in AFAB (assigned female at birth) people. A trip to the doctor later, I had my diagnosis as well. Two kids with ADHD, Mom with ADHD, and an entire plethora of other kids who have, or could have, ADHD. Only two are mine, but I’m also a middle school teacher, so there are more, so many more.
The more I researched, the more I learned. About me, about my kids, and about my students. I was able to provide tools to my son to help him beyond planners, and exercise (not that these are not valid options, but they don't work for everyone). Things like using a smartwatch to help make reminders on the spot, including medication reminders, a struggle for many with ADHD. I have taught him everything I learned along the way, so he can be more knowledgeable about ADHD. How it doesn’t make him any less intelligent than his peers, how he can use it to his advantage in some cases, and above all, that he can speak freely about it because there is no shame in having ADHD, or any other disability. I also taught him about advocating for himself and his needs, and reminding his teachers of accommodations in an appropriate way. I was able to get myself to the point where I understood that he needed to take ownership of his own education. I did my best to supply him with the necessary tools, and that allowed me to step back and let him learn how to speak up for himself and function best in the world he has to exist in. The fact he was in middle school, and I taught middle school, I was able to combine his experience, with my research and knowledge, and apply them to my own classroom as well. I was also able to adapt them for my younger son. It has been one stone that has continued to cause ripples throughout the ocean of possibilities.
Shortly after discovering my ADHD, more discoveries were made: Anxiety, OCPD (obsessive compulsive personality disorder), and cPTSD (complex post-traumatic stress disorder). These new discoveries came with, unlocked or revived past traumas as well, and of course they came served with several side dishes such as RSD (rejection sensitivity dysphoria), IS (imposter syndrome), Emotional Dysregulation, and difficulty in social and work situations. Since I received my diagnosis, along with some very helpful medication, managing “all the things” has become quite a bit easier. I am still learning, probably always will be, but I finally have a name to go with my feelings and explanation to all those struggles that I have had since I was young. I also know that I am not alone.
With help from a bunch of people, including a community of like minded neurodivergents, I am now a much better version of myself. My brain can focus, I am more confident, less stressed, and I am also able to help others. It is a work in progress, as am I, but I am getting there.
-Chris
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